Aroha went to live with her kuia, Nan, as a baby. Her own
mother was working in the city.
Aroha’s grandmother had brought up lots of children and she was good at this. Nan was strict, sometimes Aroha thought she was really fierce, and she was a little afraid of her. At other times though, she would be soft and quiet and Aroha would snuggle up beside her.
When Aroha was five, her mum got married to Jim. It was exciting. There were lots of relatives and there was heaps to eat and drink. She and the other kids danced and played until they were exhausted. Aroha could still hear people dancing and singing as she fell asleep in the corner.
In the next five years, Mum and Jim had three children, and Aroha got to go and visit them occasionally. It was fun to play with the little kids and have them fight for her attention. But things were often strained between Mum and Jim, and she was always pleased to go home to Nan.
It was a real shock to Aroha when Nan announced one day that she thought the family should all be together, and that Aroha should live with Mum and Jim. It got worse when Mum said that Nan was too old to be putting up with kids, and that she wouldn’t be able to visit Nan any more. Aroha told herself it would be good to be part to a family, but she often had to stop her legs from taking her back to Nan. A lot of the time, Aroha felt really angry, but when she told Mum this she’d get sent to her room. This was confusing to her as Mum and Jim seemed to always be telling each other they were angry.
One night, when Aroha was in bed, they had a really big fight and Mum stormed out. She could hear Jim go to the cupboard and get the bottle of whiskey out. Then everything went quiet.
She was just dozing off when she became aware that Jim was standing next to the bed. He lay down beside her and said he needed a cuddle. Then he put his hands under her nightie. Aroha tried to pull away but he held onto her and told her this is what all fathers and daughters do, and since her own father wasn’t around, he’d do it instead.
He lay on top of her and repeatedly forced her to have sexual intercourse. The pain was terrible. Afterwards, she discovered she was bleeding and thought she was going to die. She felt really awful and desperately wanted her nan.
Going to school was a way of getting out of the house, but it was hard to concentrate on her work. She constantly left her homework behind, forgot how to spell, and had to sit out during kapa haka practice because she was too sore.
Aroha tried to find out from friends if it was happening to them, but it was hard to discuss and they didn’t seem to understand her subtle questions. She started to feel different and more and more alone.
When she was gathering up her books after school one day, her kaiako, Miss Costello, approached her. She had noticed how quiet and pre-occupied Aroha seemed to be and wondered if anything was the matter. When Aroha just shrugged, Miss said she had been concerned about her and thought there might be something wrong at home. That night, Aroha was in turmoil. She was amazed Miss had noticed her. It had been really tempting to come straight out and tell her, but instead she had frozen on the spot.
Telling seemed really scary, but the thought of her stepdad lying on top of her again made her feel sick. The thought that it would go on forever was unbearable. Telling would be a real relief, but what would he do if she did? What would Mum think? What if everyone at school found out? What would happen to her?
Aroha’s grandmother had brought up lots of children and she was good at this. Nan was strict, sometimes Aroha thought she was really fierce, and she was a little afraid of her. At other times though, she would be soft and quiet and Aroha would snuggle up beside her.
When Aroha was five, her mum got married to Jim. It was exciting. There were lots of relatives and there was heaps to eat and drink. She and the other kids danced and played until they were exhausted. Aroha could still hear people dancing and singing as she fell asleep in the corner.
In the next five years, Mum and Jim had three children, and Aroha got to go and visit them occasionally. It was fun to play with the little kids and have them fight for her attention. But things were often strained between Mum and Jim, and she was always pleased to go home to Nan.
It was a real shock to Aroha when Nan announced one day that she thought the family should all be together, and that Aroha should live with Mum and Jim. It got worse when Mum said that Nan was too old to be putting up with kids, and that she wouldn’t be able to visit Nan any more. Aroha told herself it would be good to be part to a family, but she often had to stop her legs from taking her back to Nan. A lot of the time, Aroha felt really angry, but when she told Mum this she’d get sent to her room. This was confusing to her as Mum and Jim seemed to always be telling each other they were angry.
One night, when Aroha was in bed, they had a really big fight and Mum stormed out. She could hear Jim go to the cupboard and get the bottle of whiskey out. Then everything went quiet.
She was just dozing off when she became aware that Jim was standing next to the bed. He lay down beside her and said he needed a cuddle. Then he put his hands under her nightie. Aroha tried to pull away but he held onto her and told her this is what all fathers and daughters do, and since her own father wasn’t around, he’d do it instead.
He lay on top of her and repeatedly forced her to have sexual intercourse. The pain was terrible. Afterwards, she discovered she was bleeding and thought she was going to die. She felt really awful and desperately wanted her nan.
Going to school was a way of getting out of the house, but it was hard to concentrate on her work. She constantly left her homework behind, forgot how to spell, and had to sit out during kapa haka practice because she was too sore.
Aroha tried to find out from friends if it was happening to them, but it was hard to discuss and they didn’t seem to understand her subtle questions. She started to feel different and more and more alone.
When she was gathering up her books after school one day, her kaiako, Miss Costello, approached her. She had noticed how quiet and pre-occupied Aroha seemed to be and wondered if anything was the matter. When Aroha just shrugged, Miss said she had been concerned about her and thought there might be something wrong at home. That night, Aroha was in turmoil. She was amazed Miss had noticed her. It had been really tempting to come straight out and tell her, but instead she had frozen on the spot.
Telling seemed really scary, but the thought of her stepdad lying on top of her again made her feel sick. The thought that it would go on forever was unbearable. Telling would be a real relief, but what would he do if she did? What would Mum think? What if everyone at school found out? What would happen to her?
What would you do?
Do you think Aroha should tell? Or do you think she should keep quiet? TELL KEEP QUIET
